Someone’s cobbled together a trailer
A trailer has been put together for a new Home Alone movie which imagines what it’d be like if the Wet Bandits were released from prison in 2024.
Here’s something to make you feel old: it’s been 34 years since Home Alone was first released, and a precocious young boy tormented a pair of nefarious burglars with a series of traps which arguably ought to have killed them.
In the original movies Kevin McCallister (Macaulay Culkin, or Macaulay Macaulay Culkin Culkin if we’re using his full name) is accidentally abandoned by his family as they head off for Christmas, and they don’t realise until well past a time child protective services would deem appropriate.
Also, he discovers the importance of family and the meaning of Christmas along the way, but we all know you’re really watching Home Alone for the delicious final act when Harry (Joe Pesci) and Marv (Daniel Stern) must run a hellish gauntlet and sustain multiple serious injuries.
A couple of years later, they did the whole thing again, this time in New York, where Kevin’s traps would definitely have reaped a bloody toll, had the film not been working on the childlike wonder of Christmas movies.
This parody Home Alone trailer, for a potential third film to be called Kevin’s Revenge, imagines what it’d be like if the Wet Bandits got out of prison and decided the best course of action was to make a beeline for the guy who’d put them through hell twice.
Considering how old they’d be, and with Kevin in the prime of his life, this would likely be more of an audition for a new entry in the Saw franchise instead of some Home Alone festive fare.
You can bet if old Harry and Marv went hunting Kevin with the murderous rage that comes from stewing in prison Kevin would have some way of stopping them for good.
Of course, this new trailer isn’t for a real movie that’s coming out, and there already was a Home Alone 3 (and a Home Alone 4, for that matter) all the way back in 1997.
It’s instead been put together by a fan who seems to want to revive that 90s nostalgia.
The real third instalment was the first Home Alone movie not to star Macaulay Culkin, and was set after Christmas instead of during it. This time, a kid called Alex Pruitt (Alex D. Linz) had to survive four international criminals who were part of a Hong Kong terrorist group with links to North Korea.
If the Wet Bandits went for a round three against Kevin McCallister you’d probably have to call a morgue, not the police. (YouTube/VJ4rawr2)
It’s a bit of a change in pace from the Wet Bandits, isn’t it?
For those interested, Home Alone 4 pivots things away from globetrotting terrorist gangs and back to Kevin McCallister, this time played by Mike Weinberg, while his parents are getting divorced.
Marv even makes a return, played by French Stewart instead of Daniel Stern this time, but the film got very bad reviews, and you might not want to spend your previous Christmas movie watching time on it.
If you ever wanted to make the fan-made trailer into something more substantial, then you’d simply have to become a multi-millionaire and fund an entire movie production yourself.
